Cocks

Tip - don't become a headmaster if your name is Denis S. Cocks



I imagine he didn't get hassled enough at school, so decided to go back.

Chill

When I meet angry people I like to say 'Chill out dude' or 'Take a chill pill'

It usually calms them right down...

Christchurch Moments 4

I always suspected it, but now it has been proven a scientific fact.

Christchurch sucks rat anus!

So I will shortly be moving home to the tropical paradise of Auckland.

In the meantime, here's what will surely be one of my final Christchurch moments. And it comes courtesy of Les Mills gymnasium.

When I first joined, the changing room doors had no windows - thus requiring care when opening them to avoid blood noses.

So the gym geniuses put some little windows in the doors. Unfortunately this meant that perverts could peek into the changing rooms.

The solution?



Put mesh over the windows so you can't see through them anymore.
And people say gym staff are meatheads...

Bieber Fever!

I was worried that my Bieber Fever wasn't going away, so I went to the doctor.

It turns out I have Bieber AIDS :(

LOL

If this is your first time on the internetweb... welcome!
You may not be familiar with the abbreviation LOL - which most commonly means Laughing Out Loud. It's very popular.

The only question is - Is there actually any other way to laugh than 'out loud'? Surely if it's not out loud, it's not actually a laugh.

From now on just type L - for Laughing. Even though you're probably just typing in silence.

Sleepy

I'm feeling really tired tonight, but I just want to write one more blog post before I go to sleep.

I hope I make it. My eyelids are feeling heavy. If I could only just... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Oh sorry. I feel asleep on the z key.

Wees

Do you ever flush the toilet in the middle of a wee, and the see if you can get all of your wees out before the flush ends?

I don't. I just wondered if you did.